Welcome to the first day of 2019! How did you spend New Year’s? Did you go out or did you do as I did and stay in? I’ve never been one to celebrate New Year’s Eve, and besides a NYE
dance festival I attended in my early twenties I have never really left the confines of my couch. Sex and The City #2 was on so I rang in the New Year with Carrie, Charlotte, Samantha and Miranda…the perfect start to a brand new year.
2018 was a funny year for me. It was great as I got to travel to not one but two continents and I had a lot of fun nights out with new friends but towards the end of the year things took a
downturn and life got hard. But my motto in life has always been to push through each situation, no matter how tough and to persevere and that’s exactly what I did. I discovered a lot about myself as a person and would even go as far to say that I evolved too. Things that were weighing me down had to be set free, and while I am not there totally, I am striving towards that and that’s all that matters. I also learnt to let go of who I thought I should be. This was a really hard one for me as I absolutely hate change and cling to the past more than I should, but it’s so important to grow.
Here’s what my goals are for
Letting go of who I think I
should be. This was probably the toughest goal I’ve set for myself but it was a long time coming. All my life I’ve viewed myself in a certain way and thought this was who I should be, instead of letting myself grow naturally and change. Instead of viewing myself as the ‘good girl’, the eager to please person, the person who doesn’t want to upset others, I now want to be a person who totally embraces parts of
herself, good and bad. I need to stop being so eager to please and put myself first. I also need to speak my mind more and let others know when they’ve acted out of line. This was a HUGE one for me. God, all the times I’ve let people treat me badly or put me down and have never spoken up eats me up now. I need
to remind myself I am just as worthy as anyone else and I won’t tolerate
certain behaviour anymore.
Take more time out for myself.
It’s no secret that I am a true introvert and need time on my own to function. If I spend too much time with people I end up glassy eyed and confused. You’d be surprised at how many people don’t understand how introverts operate and expect them to just turn up all the time! This year I am putting my foot down
and only socialising when I feel like it (and I won’t bother explaining either!).
Write. I am not a great writer. Probably not
even a good writer. But I can’t not write; it is my passion and when I feel most like myself. While I love beauty and will continue to make it this blog’s main focus I also want to introduce topics such as women’s rights/health, think
pieces and personal posts. These are all areas that I have wanted to write about for awhile but didn’t want to lose sight of what A Beauty Wanderer is mostly about, which is a beauty/skincare blog. While I still adore all things
beauty I don’t feel the need to buy the latest product releases anymore; maybe it’s an age thing or the fact that I don’t wear much makeup anymore. Either way, I am looking forward to expanding into other areas.
Stop thinking about what I don’t have and focus on what I do. While I am not really a jealous person I do tend to envy others’ lifestyle and possessions. When I see women who don’t
have to work, who live in a beautiful home and get to shop to their heart’s content I do experience pangs of jealousy. While it would be great to live that way unfortunately for me it’s not possible and I need to remember that. I can
have all those things but only if I work and put in the effort. I am a firm believer that we can create the lifestyle that we want, but those dreams only work if we do. Instead of wishing for a life that is unattainable, I need to focus on what I do have. I have a job that allows me to travel and purchase anything that I desire, a house that I (well, we) saved up to purchase with our own money and freedom to do whatever I want, when I want.
Stop making excuses for other people’s behaviours. For the longest time I would make excuses if somebody was rude, arrogant or just downright cruel. I’d tell myself that maybe they were having a bad day, or had had a hard life or didn’t know how to interact with others for whatever reason. Now, I try to take people at face value. If they are rude, they are rude and that’s all there is to it. I don’t try to read into
it because there is really no excuse. We all have problems in life but lashing out at others repeatedly doesn’t make it better. This is something I’ve experienced with people close to me and I found I would make excuses for them until I realised that that was their choice. They chose to be miserable and negative and that’s fine but I wanted nothing to do with it. Now, if others show me their true colours I accept it at face value. Sometimes people are just cruel and callous and that’s all there is to it.
This year’s resolutions are definitely more thinking rather than doing and I am really happy with that. I tend to just focus on things that need physical doing and brush aside my
mental health and that’s just not healthy.
What were some of your resolutions for 2019? Are they more internal than external?
*photo credit: Pinterest